Juxtaposition is a timeless literary trick. Placing negative and positive in opposition, creating muscular parallel sentences, or they as teach you in art school, aiming for the “strident” application of opposites is the hallmark of a master.
Poorly executed juxtaposition, on the other hand, is worse than passionate activity with inanimate objects. In literary form, it leaves one lifeless and limp.
The question of this review is, thus, whether the prequel to Pride and Predjudice and Zombies, the most successful literary mash-up of 2009, is DOA or a whole new trick. Or put another way, will Dawn of the Dreadfuls make you puke or pant for more?
Let us waffle for a moment.
On the one hand, we find the work to be the intellectual equivalent of a deviant fetish. On the the other hand, we find that very prurience appealing. It is written in a way that builds just enough dread to make you either kneel at prayer or beg for something really bad.
There is something, we dunno, positively dirty about this book.
So far.
In the spirit of full disclosure (and dreading a deadline here) we have not yet finished the work. Should you need to sate that passion immediately click right here.
Hiya: We’re back again with an abbreviated yet complete review of this new work.
We know, one, fun and done.
Sadly we do not refer to the first time one smashes the putrid flesh out of a zombie, but instead to the short yet sublime experience most readers will have with the zombie mash-up genre. While titilated by the first book, they perhaps might not pick up this fine prequel.
We dread the thought, because in many ways it is better.
Morsel One: This book is easier to read that than the original Zombies smash as it avoids the bountiful yet breathy prose of Ms. Austen. It reads a little more like a movie, which, after all is a pure delight for the following reason: the chicks kick some serious ass. The skirts are lifted here and nothing is safe.
Morsel Two: The dreadfuls are even more disgusting. How delish.
Morsel Three: The cover of the book makes it look like the little one has experienced womanhood. Is this appropriate? We believe the answer lies in the original gist of the Victorians. “Victorian Woman” is penultimate euphemism for passions long repressed. If Ms.Austen were to rise from her grave tomorrow we believe she would scream like a banshee in ecstasy that her deepest passions have been co-opted by another writer. A man, no less.
Pray tell, does this mean Jane would feel jaded?
No. She would find Mr. Hockensmith. Kill him. Eat him. Then leverage the movie rights.
Which would obscure the fact that Mr. Hockensmith has created an entirely new work here, unlike the original franchise (which is pure mash, if that is a term).
It would be soooo unfair.
Then again, so is Hollywood.
Obama said something that did make sense about cars lately. I am pretty sure he gushed about the new Chevy Malibu, and why not? The drivetrain is smooth and quiet. It has a steering column mounted, 6-speed paddle shifting and it has what appears to be actual wood trim, sparingly used on the interior. The exterior design is also pared back and looks quite fetching in a green or gray metallic. Best of all, it just looks more sporting than Camry or an Accord when you have to drive long distances in a corporate caravan. If I had a corporate job, I rent it just to avoid an identity crisis.
You know those cool flashlights the cops and NCIS guys use all the time on TV? It’s true, gone are the days of the 8 D-cell monsters cops used to carry. They’ve been replaced by light, pocket sized, and high intensity models–such as the 
. This light is a little over five inches long, weighs only five ounces, and easily fits in a pants pocket or the 
.
.
Using the right tool for the job is more than a cliché. Whatever the job is, having good tools makes it more pleasurable, and, we might add, easier. 
.
You’ve heard the adage, “The difference between men and boys is the price of their toys.” It’s true. But while you are saving up for the real expensive toys, like the Aston Martin DB9, you can keep your mind sharp with a few well chosen toys like this. You probably played the plastic version of Connect Four, but 
